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Why you might go to jail if you chainsaw a Zombie in Huntsville, Alabama.

I’m shooting this video right before Halloween. Today’s question is “Could you go to jail if you chainsaw a zombie in Huntsville, Alabama?

Of course, we have to assume zombies are real for this question, but, if you if they were and you were to chainsaw attack a zombie would be a crime in Huntsville?

Alabama has a crime called “Abuse of a Corpse”. Someone commits this crime if, without legal authorization, they “knowingly treat a human corpse in a way that would outrage ordinary family sensibilities”.

So, if old uncle Ralph comes back as a zombie and you, the zombie slayer, take him out with a chainsaw, would you be guilty? Us Lawyers don’t think like normal people.

If I’m hired to defend the zombie slayer, I’m going to argue a zombie is not appropriately considered a corpse. I’d move to dismiss by arguing to the judge that legally, a zombie is not a corpse because a corpse is inanimate; a zombie isn’t. Therefore chainsawing a zombie is not committing the crime of “abusing a corpse” (since the zombie isn’t a corpse under the law).

If you are charged with a crime, you should speak with a competent lawyer as quickly as possible. If you’d like to speak with us, we provide a free case evaluation with no obligation. Just give us a call at 256-533-4529

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